letter #88

HMCS Iroquois
c/o GPO London
March 31/45

My Darling

And it came to pass one Saturday the postman went ashore and returned bearing a great bundle of mail! Even more remarkable was the fact that three of these letters were for the best-looking man on the ship. Do I have to tell you who that is? Guess not, after some of the salutations you used. “Handsome,” too, am I? Thats what I always thought, but its nice to hear it from someone else who isnt likely to be prejudiced. Ahem! Mustsn’t lay it on too thick, must we? We cant help being beautiful, either of us, so we’ll just have to put up with it. You’re pretty nice too, haven’t I mentioned it before? Always meant to tell you sometime, but never got round to it. And now you are taking tucks in your girdle! Well aint that something! No wonder I love you like I do. You’ll be beautifuller than ever and still be able to wear your old clothes and we wont have to buy you any new ones! Oh darling, you’re wonderful!

Note with what infinite cunning I have brought the subject back to money again! Yep. Im just an old miser. Mise, mise, mise! Its all your fault too (somehow or other) Everything is. All I am today I owe to you, my pigeon, and my future is in your hands too. I ain’t worrying! You ask my advice on alterations and additions to your budget. Only change I can see is to insert an item $7.70 for insurance. That covers our three policies monthly premiums, if my addition is correct. Helpful, aint I? Far as cutting it down goes, Im afraid I cant suggest anything. Have you considered starving the baby? Might save a little that way. Oh, here’s something, and you asked me to tell you specially. Your letter no 67, post-marked Mar 15, a three center, arrived the same day as no 66 (Air Mail) Mar 11 and no 68 Mar 16 a ten-center. I dont suppose we can depend on that to always happen, so send the occasional Airletter but no more 6-cent Air Mail. We’ll save 18¢ a month or more! It will amount to a staggering sum in a few centuries. Figure it out, its beyond me! I’ve no other constructive (?) ideas so we’ll just reconcile ourselves to being poor. Fun, aint it? I’d much rather be poor with you, darling, than wealthy with Carmen Miranda, the hussy!

I love you very much, Wannie, but its impossible to answer three wonderful letters on this one form. One of them is 20 pages! I aint going to try, but will work back through them, starting with the most recent, and just hit the high spots. Then at my leisure I’ll do them properly per “longie”. Is permission granted?

Tomorrow is Easter, so your greetings arrived in tons of time. Same to you, of course, and many of them. Phooey on Easter cards, I wouldn’t trade one of your letters for a million cards. I wrote to Aunt M. so she knows I received hers. Dont buy me anything, you silly thing! Not even a hanky or collar button. Especially a collar button. I’d never wear it, and it would just lie around gathering dust, and maybe Evelyn would swallow it! No, we cant have that. Say, maybe she inherits her tantrums from me. I used to have tantrums and fits when I was youngish. One of Auntie M’s favourite stories is about the time she was left in charge of me, and I threw a fit (do you blame me?) and she thought I was dead. Poor old Auntie! I got over them quite nicely thank you, and only have fits or tantrums on special occasions, like when the postman lets me down, or when the rum issue is late!

Of course I was thinking of you at 7 oclock that evening. That is, if I was awake I was. I doubt very much if any of my waking hours pass without me thinking of you several times. You are just about the only subject I ever spend any time thinking about. Bad grammer, but I hope you get the idea.

Too bad you got hooked for a license for Jill, but as you say, she’s probably worth it. Its worse about the pups though. Couldn’t you keep her on the straight and narrow till we could arrange a pure-bred husband for her? If she doesn’t turn out so well as a hunter, I sort of thought one of her pups might. Plenty of time yet, and she can have lots of litters without any bad effects. Not while you’re still at the flat, of course. You need lots of room to raise dogs.

How did the accompanying at the Empress go? I bet you wowed them and you’re too modest to say so! I’m very glad you did it, its good for you. Mustn’t stay home and “vegetate” just because Evelyn is here now. Do you think that some day she be a brilliant musician like her mummie? I sounds as though she may be a singer. Prima Donna, of course, with her temperament! (Thats what you imagine is “tantrums”, its just her artistic temperament, poor wee thing!) And you say she can sing two note exercises already? My, my, my. She’s certainly precocious!

Thanks for all the info. about our old friends. They get around, dont they? No, dont get me a cap badge. As explained before, I am taking steps to bring my kit up to date here. And I have sufficient boodle “missed” to finance it. Say, we havent been paid this month yet, and its the 31^st. Must see about that. Its a quarterly settlement too should get an extra quid or so. Looks like this will be all this time, damn these small forms! Will write again in a few days. Im fine thanks, and all is well, forgot to tell you sooner. I love you terrificly too, with the usual small allowance to Mum and Evelyn.

Bye now
Les